I read it over and over then and over the months that followed and could not find the problem. I still don't know what it was. The section has been reworked so many times in my half-crazed efforts to fix what I didn't see, that I can't go back to it and see if I've grown enough as a writer to figure it out. But my confidence had been shaken. I bought books on POV, read every blog that mentions it, and my inner critic especially loves to whisper in my ear, "Yesssss but have you checked the POV!?"
Off the page, however, point of view is becoming clearer and clearer. The writing concept is an exceptional tool for viewing interpersonal relationships. Hubby and I often discuss books we are reading, and I am always pointing out the obvious violations of POV standards. Move that into real life, apply it to real living breathing people, and there is much to learn.
Attributing feelings and thoughts to others is now so commonplace, but is not always obvious. Think about story POV and it is more easily revealed; in a written story, we would think "He couldn't possibly know that." My own inner dialogue often totally violates point-of-view when I make an assumption about what another is thinking--about me, about others, about politics--even about God. We box people up in a stereotype, tie a bow on it, and limit our capacity to listen and understand.
The greatest peace this has brought me is the ability to see when somebody has "head-hopped" into my head and applied a label. Hello there, fella, "You can't possibly know that." And it isn't true...
Maybe someday I'll be confident about POV in my writing. But for now, this is good bonus insight.